My sanity.

...or the lack of it.

I lose the plot sometimes. And each time i lose it, it gets harder & harder to find. It scares me sometimes, how i seem to lose my mind these days. My mind. Neurons. Braincells. Whachamacallit.

Like the other day. I go through my normal 'grooming' ritual: Brush teeth. Wash face. Jump into shower. Towel off. Deo. Moisturizer. Under garments. Clothes. Proceed to make-up. Then hair. Wear watch. Accessories. Perfume. DONE.

But on SEVERAL separate occasions, i forget half-way. I'll be toweling off and can't remember if i've washed my face. *Freeze. Rack brains. Can't recall. Muka O_o* Then on another occasion, i'd be starting on my make-up and then realize i haven't moisturized. Or did i? Dah ke belum? OMG. I. CAN'T. REMEMBER. I feel panic bubbling from the inside. Not cause i'm a Vaintart, but because i feel like i'm going crazy. Insane. Que: Cypress Hill - "Insane in the membrane..."

***

Speaking of sanity. I DO get whiffs of it. Tastes of it. Flirty touches. They come fleetingly. I look for it when i feel i'm losing grip on things.

Family = ♥. :)

Last weekend was one of those instances:



My 2 year old niece, Shakira. Aku cair when i'm with her. On the way back from PD the other day, she curled up to me in the car & slept. *melts*



And oh how i love the sea.



Something about all that water. Reminds me that there's something greater than all of us. Our drama. The daily bullshit. It really doesn't matter.

***

~RESERVED~

Just like the best table at a good restaurant...

Adriana is...




***

Sumone i recently met told me that I'm a very reserved person. (My close friends would OF COURSE beg to differ). But am i? REALLY? *muka tak percaya* I guess I've always guarded my thoughts and feelings rather carefully. I mean, it wouldn't be strange for you to hear bursts of random emotional farts online (Tweet tweet) but when asked, face to face, I'd rather not bare it all. I ESPECIALLY shut off when i feel I'm being mentally-probed.


I believe... getting to know someone, lies in the observing and noticing the little details that make them who they are. Half of the fun, is letting these endearing traits reveal itself. You don't want it pointed out to you. You want to become your very own Columbus and discover them yourself. Once discovered, it's slowly explored... and the experience itself is new... and exhilarating. And OMG did u notice how I just likened you to America? O_o. HAHAHAHAA. Ultimate compliment sial. ;)


Was watching 'War, Inc.' the other day and thought this line sums it all quite beautifully:

Did you know that the word "person" comes from the Latin word "persona", which means mask? So maybe being human means we invite spectators to ponder what lies behind. Each of us will be composed of a variety of masks, and if we can see behind the mask, we would get a burst of clarity. And if that flame was bright enough, that's when we fall in love.

Couldn't have said it better myself.

EAT MY DUST ELAIIIIINE!!!

HAHAHAHAHHAA.



Told you I'd BRINGGIT! *Ghetto-chick-stare*

Justine... if ur reading this. I'm just trynna rub it in my fren's face la hor. Not intentionally dissing you or ur clicking powers, by any means. ;p

MY "Bathwater"...

"Cause i love to wash in your old bathwater
love to think that you couldn't love another
I'm on your list with all your other women
but i still love to wash in your old bathwater
you make me feel like i couldn't love another
i can't help it..you're my kinda of maNnN."


Babe, if ur reading this...sorry. A man cooking in his boxers? Cudn't resist. ;)

"Oh, look Ma...a Pig!"

...Sez the first person contracting the Swine Flu.

***

You know how, for the past month I've been making fun of all things swine AND swine related? Well...it's FLU, has come back to haunt me. -_-. Yes people, I am currently under home-quarantine for being a suspect Influenza A(h1n1)victim(?)-SLASH-carrier *Looks down in defeat*. Been feeling feverish on-and-off for the past week or so and developed flu a few days later. Got worried coz there were confirmed h1n1 cases at Urbanscapes.

Being the Hypochondriac that I am, my paranoia (fortified by my PARENTS' paranoia) urged me to go to the doctors. So, i went to HUKM. I was isolated (official term: quarantined), poked EVERYWHERE for blood (apparetly coz I'm so small and "halus", they can't find my veins -_-) and I.V dripped me like there's no tomorrow. And oh ya, did i mention? They made me wear a facemask...AND sit on a damn wheelchair while i was hooked-up to the I.V drip. Tiu Na Seng. Having the flu, does not make me an O.K.U. -___-.

Anyways, after more than 3 hours at the hospital... the doctor released me. I'm under "goverment M.C" - Watever that means, till weds untill i get my bloodtest results. Shud i be in the clear, life goes on as normal. Shud i be positive for h1n1, somebody from Sungai Buloh Hospital will come and collect me.

At the moment, I feel sluggish frm all the medication and I feel like crap (and prolly look like one too) *SIGH*.

Ok, getting drowsy.

Oh, before i forget. Sorry pigs, if i ever made fun of you. I din mean it ok. Pls dun unleash ur pig-wrath on me now. I have some radio ad scripts to present to clients sumtime VERY soon. Thank you.