Mari menulis.

So.

I have been slowly formulating loose new year's resolution(s) this past week. Well... it's quite daunting to call it RESOLUTIONS, so I'm going to call them PLANS, instead. Yes. I am formulating new year's plans, as we speak. :)

One of 'em shall be to update this blog everyday. Another would be to cut down on my coffee intake to, let's just say... a cup every working day week? (I've been doing that for the past week actually! Bangga.)

Things have been going according to plan lately. Adry's getting with the program. Hooray. Sila tepuk tangan!

I've left CRUSH & joined BBDO/Proximity. :)

I've detoxed you outta my system. Close to completely. :D

I've been making ME, the most important person in my life. :)

And i actually LIKE my own company. Sumtimes even more than other people's. O_o.

***

My head's going sum place different right now. A.D.D sial. -_-. Gotta work on that. Ooh look sumthing shiiiiny!

My sanity.

...or the lack of it.

I lose the plot sometimes. And each time i lose it, it gets harder & harder to find. It scares me sometimes, how i seem to lose my mind these days. My mind. Neurons. Braincells. Whachamacallit.

Like the other day. I go through my normal 'grooming' ritual: Brush teeth. Wash face. Jump into shower. Towel off. Deo. Moisturizer. Under garments. Clothes. Proceed to make-up. Then hair. Wear watch. Accessories. Perfume. DONE.

But on SEVERAL separate occasions, i forget half-way. I'll be toweling off and can't remember if i've washed my face. *Freeze. Rack brains. Can't recall. Muka O_o* Then on another occasion, i'd be starting on my make-up and then realize i haven't moisturized. Or did i? Dah ke belum? OMG. I. CAN'T. REMEMBER. I feel panic bubbling from the inside. Not cause i'm a Vaintart, but because i feel like i'm going crazy. Insane. Que: Cypress Hill - "Insane in the membrane..."

***

Speaking of sanity. I DO get whiffs of it. Tastes of it. Flirty touches. They come fleetingly. I look for it when i feel i'm losing grip on things.

Family = ♥. :)

Last weekend was one of those instances:



My 2 year old niece, Shakira. Aku cair when i'm with her. On the way back from PD the other day, she curled up to me in the car & slept. *melts*



And oh how i love the sea.



Something about all that water. Reminds me that there's something greater than all of us. Our drama. The daily bullshit. It really doesn't matter.

***

~My 100th post~

Dear self-righteous prick,


PLEASE FUCK OFF & DIE.


✌.


Much love,
Witless speck of dust.



P/s: I hate you. :)

Sometimes...

...

.....

.......

Why am I still clinging on to this?

The past. The present. The doomed future.

It's comforting to know that I'm not alone in this.

Borrowed words via http://typewriterblues.tumblr.com/

I Wrote This For You: The Handled With Care

"If you knew how much trouble the universe went to for us to be here, now, standing in front of each other, you'd know we're going to have to be careful.

Plankton and plants and canals, a hundred suns, a thousand sailing ships, ten thousand civilizations, a million, million, million first kisses from all our mothers and fathers.

We owe it to them, to be careful."


Borrowed words via:
I Wrote This For You: The Handled With Care

Shared via AddThis

WELCOME THE HUNGER

The Hun­ger to do something creative.

The Hun­ger to do something amazing.

The Hun­ger to change the world.

The Hun­ger to make a difference.

The Hun­ger to enjoy one’s work.

The Hun­ger to be able to look back and say, Yeah, cool, I did that.

The Hun­ger to make the most of this utterly brief blip of time Crea­tion has given us.

The Hun­ger to dream the good dreams.

The Hun­ger to have ama­zing peo­ple in our lives.

The Hun­ger to have the synap­ses con­ti­nually fired up on overdrive.

The Hun­ger to expe­rience beauty.

The Hun­ger to tell the truth.

The Hun­ger to be part of something big­ger than yourself.

The Hun­ger to have good sto­ries to tell.

The Hun­ger to stay the course, des­pite of the odds.

The Hun­ger to feel passion.

The Hun­ger to know and express Love.

The Hun­ger to know and express Joy.

The Hun­ger to chan­nel The Divine.

The Hun­ger to actually feel alive.

The Hun­ger will give you everything. And it will take from you, everything. It will cost you your life, and there’s not a damn thing you can do about it.

But kno­wing this, of course, is what ulti­ma­tely sets you free.

~Hugh MacLeod (via gapingvoid.com)

Adry Dumpty.

"People don't want their lives fixed. Nobody wants their problems solved. Their dramas. Their distractions. Their stories resolved. Their messes cleaned up. Because what would they have left? Just the big scary unknown." ~Chuck Palahniuk

-Pic courtesy of iknowg.com-

It's official.

A little piece inside of me just died today.

All.

Over.

Again.

Sometimes I think I never really mend from anything.

THIS is the story of the Doomed.

...

....

.....

......

Here it comes...

"I WANNA BE GOOD FOR YOU GODDAMIT!!! AM I NOT ENOUGH? Am i NOT wife material? WAT THE EFF DUDE?!!"


*sigh*


Sorry for the Hurricane Katrina-ish emotional outburst. But like, i just can't tahan anymore y'know. -_-. I dun give a flying FUCK if you *points to the left* or YOU *points to the right* sees this and perasan I'm talking about you. KOrang semua sama je lah. Same bullshit, same drama, different cock. -_________-.


*Grr*


I wanna articulate this is an 'artsy-fartsy-fuck-me-lah-artsy-konon' kinda way. So u may ALSO have a crush on me (of the artsy kind. Pfft!)... but i can't. I wasn't wired to be berbunga.


You asked me once, wat was my GREATEST fear. I said, "1)If people realized that i had nuthing goin' on upstairs i.e. STUPID and 2)To be boring." But now... i think, one of my greatest fears... is to 'Not be enough for sumone'. I'm either TOO much or TOO little. Why can't i fucking swing and land sumwhere in the middle? It's like that STUPID flying-monkey-game that i used to play on ur Nintendo box Babe. The paragliding monkey one? Where i'm supposed to land the primate on the landing mark? Yea. That one! I feel like i can never land in the middle and score the 100 points.


Self-doubt is REALLY unattractive. Stopping this shit. Like, RITE NOW!


*Lifts head in defiance*

~RESERVED~

Just like the best table at a good restaurant...

Adriana is...




***

Sumone i recently met told me that I'm a very reserved person. (My close friends would OF COURSE beg to differ). But am i? REALLY? *muka tak percaya* I guess I've always guarded my thoughts and feelings rather carefully. I mean, it wouldn't be strange for you to hear bursts of random emotional farts online (Tweet tweet) but when asked, face to face, I'd rather not bare it all. I ESPECIALLY shut off when i feel I'm being mentally-probed.


I believe... getting to know someone, lies in the observing and noticing the little details that make them who they are. Half of the fun, is letting these endearing traits reveal itself. You don't want it pointed out to you. You want to become your very own Columbus and discover them yourself. Once discovered, it's slowly explored... and the experience itself is new... and exhilarating. And OMG did u notice how I just likened you to America? O_o. HAHAHAHAA. Ultimate compliment sial. ;)


Was watching 'War, Inc.' the other day and thought this line sums it all quite beautifully:

Did you know that the word "person" comes from the Latin word "persona", which means mask? So maybe being human means we invite spectators to ponder what lies behind. Each of us will be composed of a variety of masks, and if we can see behind the mask, we would get a burst of clarity. And if that flame was bright enough, that's when we fall in love.

Couldn't have said it better myself.

"Dramasonic"

Borrowed the term from sumone. ;)

Thought he'd get the honors of being part of this blogpost for coming up with such a brill word! Big ups Si Cekodok Busuk. WAZZZAAA! haha.

Anyhoo...

Been staying away from Barsonic(slash)TAG since HE left. It's been 8 months (or so) that i haven't set foot there. Last was my birthday in December of 2008.

***

"Time to create new memories", he said. "Are u up for it?", he continued.

I contemplated. Then nodded. "I am."

Why the fuck not?















***

Thank you for breaking me outta my OWN personal Dramasonic-Hell.

Does anyone else think this is fuck-ass-funny???

... Or am I the only one?

-_-


"Today, I got a CD stuck in my computer's disc drive. I got frustrated and yelled "SURRENDER" in my scariest villain voice, and my disc was immediately ejected." ~MLIA


HAHAHAHAHAA.


I WAS gonna tweet this, but it's waaaay longer than 140 characters. And i couldn't put it up in FB (coz my current status is another asinine MLIA story: "Today, while typing the word when, the letter E got stuck, so the word became "Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee". I was pleased my computer was enjoying itself.") so... it had to go in here. -_-. Gila epic.

And oh ya. For the uninitiated, MLIA is MyLifeIsAverage.com.

I DON'T recommend MLIA for the uncoordinated and those with poor multitasking skills. Coz you'll be reading, laughing AND peeing in your pants... all at the same time.

You have been warned.

;)

Best @ Tweet response EVER!

Well... at least *i* think so. ;)





In response to:




Made me smile.

:)

I'm in Miami Bitch!

I know you'll be singing this song THE MOMENT u land! ;)





Don't even be frontin' Babe. You KNOW ur gonna.

(Even if it's just in ur head.)

I can SO see u doing it. Hands in the ayer... lips all Nigga-Gangstah-Puckered...

XP

The conversation last nite was a little weird. Partly coz i was groggy (Hel-low! 3.30am?) and coz dialing from a US number from Saudi results in sum MAJOR voice delay. -_-.

But i appreciate the thought. ;D

Be happy in Miami Babe. STUDY HARD! A master's Degree is no joke. *Squints eyes, points index finger to screen* And DON'T drag it like u did with ur Bachelor's Degree pls. It was cute back then, not so much now with the wife in tow. ;p

FOCUSSSS THE MUCUSSSS!

EAT MY DUST ELAIIIIINE!!!

HAHAHAHAHHAA.



Told you I'd BRINGGIT! *Ghetto-chick-stare*

Justine... if ur reading this. I'm just trynna rub it in my fren's face la hor. Not intentionally dissing you or ur clicking powers, by any means. ;p

You were right... (as much as i hate to admit it)

... you raised the bar.

WAAAAAAY up there! *hand level gauge positioned above head*

Now HOW am i supposed to date other men... TELL ME? GAAAAAAH!

*Pulls hair*


***

On a more cheerful note: I am currently in a clicking war with Elaine ;D. It's this app on FB, where you have 30 seconds to click the mouse as fast as possible. It's called Click Challenge V.2. My highest score since i started (30 mins ago) stands at... 216! HAHAHA. She claims one of her friends managed 676 clicks, or sumthing. -_______-. NO. FUCKING. WAAAY. That ain't even HUMANLY possible la ok. (Wait. Elaine's forwarding me the pix as proof).



O_o


Mak ai! 695 clicks! *blank face*


This dude doesn't have a life. OR a girlfriend. Cuz if he HAD one... then he'd be clicking HER instead of a stupid mouse! SUCKAAAAAAAAAAA!!!


*Turns back to Click Challenge V.2*

XP

Lucky.

So... I'm reading this gurl's blog rite, and I can't help wondering how it feels. To be so SO in love (and in LUST!) with the guy ur about to marry. Yea, sure i was engaged a year or so ago... but i never felt THAT. Sad, i know. :(

I loved him, yea. But i wasn't 'head-over-heels-butterflies-in-ur-stomach-pussy-tingling-GAGA' about him. It was always more of a... docile/domestic sorta love. Deep... but always stagnant. Was that an early sign that it wasn't gonna work out? Or was that merely the side effects of being with someone for 5... long...years? *thinks*

She's lucky you know. VERY VERY lucky. To find someone ur absolutely BONKERS about... someone that does it for u EVERY. SINGLE. GODDAMN. TIME! And he feels the same about u. I'm happy for her. ;D I don't really know her that well... we only met a few times at LAPSAP and TAG, but she seems happy rite now. Good for her! ;D

R.I.P...

... Yasmin Ahmad.

:'(

It's a bleak Sunday today. Woke-up and heard the news of Yasmin Ahmad's passing. I can't explain it, but I'm CRUSHED! I feel like something precious has suddenly been taken away.

I've always admired her. For the courage to be herself, REGARDLESS of what haters say... For her strength to challenge people and their cynical views... and for her brilliance and sense of conviction, that all's not lost... there IS some beauty and kindness left in the world.

:'(

She was truly... TRULY special.

Updates yang ter-belated.

Things I've been up to, that never got whored-out. ;D

My niece, Shakira's 2nd birthday party:

(That's me being her very own Mak Andam.)


Sheena's birthday get-together:

(At Pavillion)



(Hel-LOOOOOW Midgyyyy! ;p)



(At Ole-Ole Bali, SoHo Mon't Kiara)



My VERY FIRST TVC shoot! ;D

(I wrote the script. Part 1 of the shoot was at the Proton R3 Racing workshop. Here's me lookin' quite terencat with the clapper board.)



(PLUS, our client wanted to incorporate the A1 Malaysia driving team into the TVCs, so the national car was part of it la. That's me with the Lotus. I was INSTANTLY attracted to THAT particular color. Neons brights...wootwoot!)






(Aaron Lim and Fairuz Fauzy of the A1 Team Malaysia)



And directly after the shoot...



Sharmila's Fant-ASS-tic 32nd birthday:

(Idea concept and copy by Adry. ;p)



(The party was at Gustav Dutch Beerhouse, so i had Hoegarden. Yuuuumz. And the best part? It came in a frikkin BOWL! *Happiness*)



(The place card, i wrote for the party. It was an undies-themed one. On the account that Shram HATES underwear. O_o. HAHAHA.)


Lastly...


Urbanscapes:


I remember last year we din make it there till 10pm! -__-. I arrived JUST as all the shops were closing. Tiu! All cuz a certain sumone cudn't be arsed to stop playing video games, get off the couch and shower. *Dark face*



(I even got a hug from the Joker maaan. Jangan main-main! haha)

Ok la. I'm hungry. Thank you for reading. Bye.

MY "Bathwater"...

"Cause i love to wash in your old bathwater
love to think that you couldn't love another
I'm on your list with all your other women
but i still love to wash in your old bathwater
you make me feel like i couldn't love another
i can't help it..you're my kinda of maNnN."


Babe, if ur reading this...sorry. A man cooking in his boxers? Cudn't resist. ;)

I HEART Richard Ayoade

THIS is MY perfect guy *SWOONS*





1) He's exotic! (Wiki: Ayoade was born an only child to a Norwegian mother and a Nigerian father)
2) He has a MESMERIZING Brit accent (as opposed to an annoying one, the majority has)
3) He doesn't JUST act! He writes... he directs (shows AND music vids, sum of which i will share with you later)... he does stand-up comedy... Talented much?
4) A sense of (twisted) humour AND hot? YES PLEASE!!!

So, who IS Richard Ayoade?

For the uninitiated:

SOURCE: Wiki ---> "Richard Ellef Ayoade (born 1977 in Whipps Cross, London[1]) is a comedian, actor, writer and director best known for his role as Maurice Moss in The IT Crowd. BLA..BLA..BLAAAA... Just see for yourself la k.


The IT Crowd: The red door


And...


The IT Crowd: The Photoshoot


And...


The IT Crowd: FIRE!



I DARE you to say he's not sexy! *Squints eyes fiercely*


Anyways...continuing on.

SOURCE: Wiki ---> "He has directed the videos for the Arctic Monkeys song 'Fluorescent Adolescent' and Super Furry Animals' new video "Run Away", which has Matt Berry in the lead role.[5] He has also directed the video for The Last Shadow Puppets song "Standing Next to Me" and "My Mistakes Were Made For You", as well as videos for Oxford Comma and Cape Cod Kwassa Kwassa by Vampire Weekend. Most recently, Ayoade directed the video for Kasabian's song, Vlad the Impaler, which starred Noel Fielding and 'Heads Will Roll' by the Yeah Yeah Yeahs."


He's getting cooler as we speak innit? ;p *Nods head* Here are some of the music vids he directed. I SO want to visit his brain! I'm sure it's endless hours of fun! :D




There's sumthing poetic about slowmo violence, especially when there's clowns involved.




That's "Richmond" from The IT Crowd, didcha notice? XP hahaha.


I can't seem to find Yeah Yeah Yeah's 'Heads Will Roll tho'. :( Not the music vid anyways. Boo! But u know wat I mean??? GOD, this is my kinda guy. *sigh* Where can i get me one of these?

Sanity : FOUND!

...and it was at the family home all along! It's true you know, what my mom said. "No wonder you're going crazy...all alone at your house over there. Come back home to your family!"

Was a blessing getting sick and what not. I got to spend 5 days in Cheras and spend time with the family. And the best thing of all? I felt a little saner after that too! Like, i found my center... *ZEEEEEEEEEEN*

Oh oh. I just found out. There's this stray cat rite, at home. And i just found out her name is... (you ready for this?)...AU-YONG!!! -__________-. Ni my brother punye keje la ni. Like, WTF rite. AU-FUCKING-YONG?!!!! He sez it's "Korean". HAHAHAHAAAA. I'm sure my dad had sumthing to do with this TOO! *Squints eyes in suspicion*

Irrelevant fact: One of my ex-gymnast teammate's name is Carolyn Au-Yong. Her dad's name was like, Au-Yong Mun Bong or sumthin. *Suppresses laughter/straight face*. Was HE the inspiration behind my cat's name? I shud ask my brother that kan. ;p

And OHMYGOD. My niece is getting soooooo clever. Like, smart-ass clever. If she wants sumthing rite, she doesn't automatically go, "Peh-liiiiz". She goes, "UT MEEEEEE" (Excuse me). With this 'eyes-closed-big-grin' look on her face. How can u say no to that?

"Oh, look Ma...a Pig!"

...Sez the first person contracting the Swine Flu.

***

You know how, for the past month I've been making fun of all things swine AND swine related? Well...it's FLU, has come back to haunt me. -_-. Yes people, I am currently under home-quarantine for being a suspect Influenza A(h1n1)victim(?)-SLASH-carrier *Looks down in defeat*. Been feeling feverish on-and-off for the past week or so and developed flu a few days later. Got worried coz there were confirmed h1n1 cases at Urbanscapes.

Being the Hypochondriac that I am, my paranoia (fortified by my PARENTS' paranoia) urged me to go to the doctors. So, i went to HUKM. I was isolated (official term: quarantined), poked EVERYWHERE for blood (apparetly coz I'm so small and "halus", they can't find my veins -_-) and I.V dripped me like there's no tomorrow. And oh ya, did i mention? They made me wear a facemask...AND sit on a damn wheelchair while i was hooked-up to the I.V drip. Tiu Na Seng. Having the flu, does not make me an O.K.U. -___-.

Anyways, after more than 3 hours at the hospital... the doctor released me. I'm under "goverment M.C" - Watever that means, till weds untill i get my bloodtest results. Shud i be in the clear, life goes on as normal. Shud i be positive for h1n1, somebody from Sungai Buloh Hospital will come and collect me.

At the moment, I feel sluggish frm all the medication and I feel like crap (and prolly look like one too) *SIGH*.

Ok, getting drowsy.

Oh, before i forget. Sorry pigs, if i ever made fun of you. I din mean it ok. Pls dun unleash ur pig-wrath on me now. I have some radio ad scripts to present to clients sumtime VERY soon. Thank you.

Was that you, making your peace with me?

A phone call does NOT constitute forgiveness.

Neither is my picking up the phone, my blessing.

So, if we DO meet 20 years down the line...I WILL pretend like we don't know each other.

Coz, truth be told... we DON'T.

:)

Good luck with America Babe.

Something's wrong. Something's VERY wrong...

*Grave face*

I don't know WHAT exactly's bothering me. But i dun feel at ease. Like, there's sumthing wrong. I came back from a meeting and all i feel is...empty. I'm having violent mood swings weyyyy and it's not fucking funny anymore! Btw...meeting was good. Client loved my copy direction. Yata yata yata. But, still...*SIGH*.

Maybe it's cuz my family hates me (And NO, I'm not being all drama about this). They went to sum sungai sumwhere for a BBQ and "forgot" to tell me. The WHOLE family ok! And no one bothered to invite me :'(. I only found out when i called my mum last Saturday to ask them out for dinner and they were all THERE already. FINE! If my family doesn't want me, then I. Don't. Want. Them!!! *Lifts chin up in determination* Am refusing to pick-up any of their calls. They should just consider themselves 2nd-daughter-less from now on.


Or maybe cuz I hate my housemate. He has a stick up his ass, I SWEAR! He gave me grief over water footmarks in the bathroom floor. It's the fucking bathroom la ok. People are bound to have footmarks on the fucking bathroom floor. Lain la kalau I'm a ghost and I float everywhere kan. Then, rest assured...you won't find footmarks anywhere. -_-. According to him, it's HIS house and he just wants it clean. DUDE. All i do is tip-toe around YOUR house and keep it clean (Up to the point i think twice before entering YOUR kitchen to cook me some eggs). GAAAAAAH! Thank GOD I'm moving out this weekend. I can't take ur OCD shit anymore. No one can la (10 bucks sez his gf is suffering in silence).

Or maybe it's my backache. It's starting to rear it's painful head again. Bitch needs to leave me alone. It's making me lose sleep (OR sleep in unnatural-not-of-this-Earth positions, just to ease the pain). Note to self: If my kids ever want to join gymnastics, just say "NO!", give them a tight slap and cartwheel off.


Or MAYBE...despite the fact that it's been half a year, and he's already married, and I'm dating people, AND we stopped talking...i STILL think of him. Okmovingon.

*Deep breaths*

God? If ur listening...I need me sum happiness. I know they don't sell the stuff in a bottle or a jar down here, but if u could just sprinkle sum on me from above...that would be GREAT, thanks! :D

-_-

Who needs a dozen red roses...

...WHEN YOU CAN HAVE A DOZEN DOUGHNUTS INSTEAD?!!








People, take note. This is the way to a girl's heart. ;)

2 Creatives + Boredom = THIS!

This is what happens when 2 people from the creative industry (1 in advertising. 1 in fashion) get bored one evening, start talking cock and get trigger happy...










The rest shall be in my (AND his) personal archives. ;)

Before i forget...

So many things i wanted to blog about, but then got distracted (with work and shit) and forgot. -_-. So here goes. All in its disjointed glory.

***

I think I've just met THE most interesting guy EVER. There's sumthing about him that i can't quite figure out...and that just adds to the appeal. *Squints eyes, looks thoughtful*. I just realized, that to get me to go all ape-shit-nuts about you, you gotta INTRIGUE me 1st. So, ANYways...yeah. After a long time, i felt it again. That thrill, u know? And not just me going, "Hmmm. He's nice" (I'm not attracted to 'NICE'!). It's like Vanilla u know...it's all sweet and pleasant...but after a while, you get bored. I'm not into that shit. All my fave ppl are a little messed-up. I feel at home with them. ;D

And you know wats even weird? He's Chinese! Sum of my closest, AWESOMEST friends are Chinese la but I've never been attracted to one. As in, sexually attracted. So, it's very surprising that the chemistry could be so ON! ;)

Here are sum reasons why I think he's crazy interesting:

- We both have a thing for skulls. 1st date, we both showed up wearing tees with skulls on 'em. His was neon bright, mine was B&W pirate-ish. ;p
- And ALTHOUGH he dresses edgy, he talks softly.
- He styles models for a living. As in fashion styling.
- His apartment is a SERIOUS dose of DOPE! Old skool-Hongkie area, small in size, but rich with kickass character.
- Don't even get me started on his wardrobe! The 2nd room's dedicated to clothes. Rails and rails of it! It's serious fabulosity.
- And at this point ur prolly thinking he's gay rite? HAHAHAHA. And u know wats interesting? He's NOT! ;) TRUST ME.
- He plays the guitar and sings. Even serenaded me once *Thumbs up*.
- Fuck-awesome Tattoos on his body (Full wings on the back, dragon on the calf, stars on the torso). Need i say more? *drools*
- He has a clothing line coming out soon. Which 'I' think is INSANE!
- He's more creative than me la ok. -_-.

Ok la enuff. Watever it is, i kinda like this guy. ;D I'm trying not to, but it's getting hard.

***

My Poomela and I met for WIP a week back and had Baskin Robbins for dessert after dinner. We were at the ice cream bar choosing flavours, and couldn't decide. So, we had small taste-scoops of everything (wheeee!) to see which flavour we liked best, at which point i went, "Sigh. Wudn't it be SO cool if choosing men were like choosing ice cream flavours? Taste-taste, then pick. So kesian ppl in arranged marriages kan? They dun get to taste the product first. Wat if you don't like the taste? You can't return it after that, OR choose sumthing different. You're basically screwed la!". :p

***

Oh ya. I'm actually being pursued. Like, 'old-skool-being-PROPERLY-courted-treat-me-like-a-princess-Buy-me-dinner' kinda pursued. I'm not sure what to make of it tho. I shud be thrilled rite? O_o. RITE???

And oh ya. Thank you for sending me the book and letter. It DID cheer me up. :D I was VERY surprised. I'm not used to this.

***

Sumthing my bestfriend's mum was telling me over the phone the other day:

"Adriana, you're a very special girl ok. Out of all the girls Aunty knows, i think ur the most special one. And one day, you'll meet a guy who thinks EXACTLY the same as Aunty. So, don't worry. You'll find the right one for you".

Gila la. I'm tearing up again.

***

Okays. More later. I have a meeting with clients in a few minutes.

"Dream on"

This is on repeat today, till i mend a little.

So, it's like that huh?

Wow. You're amazing. The way you broke it to me. Just like THAT *snaps fingers*. And the best part of all? You broke my fucking heart, and you don't even care. So brilliant were you, that you even managed to pin it back to me. Like I'M the one whose getting married. Getting married to someone you've only known for 4 fucking months!

I applaud you. For your lack of feelings...for your ability not to care...and MOST of all...for making THE BIGGEST mistake of your life. ;D *clapclap*

So, con-fucking-gratulations on your impending doom, eh...marriage, i mean.

I'm happy for you.

BABE! U SUCK!!!!

HAHAHAHAHHAHAAAA.

:-*

Happy now?

I was gonna say sumthing...

...But then i forgot.

:S

Sorryyyyyy.

I'm such a Dungu sumtimes. -_-.

Babe? You read blogs???

Like SERIOUSLY?

Well...it took you long enuff to find mine kan. ;)

Yes, i write about you. And about anything else that goes on in my life.

Cause it means THAT much to me.

And if you don't like it, well...TOUGH.

:-*

This post has no title. This post is just an expression. This one ---> -_-

OMG. Wat if i have Swine Flu? O_o. Been coughing and wheezing since Friday.

***

Random note: Ahmed called me from Saudi on Saturday (thought it was his brother, and vice versa when his brother called me on Friday ;D). He called to tell me that he had a dream about me, killing all the Hammads...with a PENCIL! Fu-yoooo. I rock yo! ;)

***

I'm hungry but damn malas to go down and get food. Lemme see if i can get Hisham to tapau for me *calls hisham*. Yay! He's tapau-ing rice for me from Maju (Nasi setengah, kari a bit, ikan yang bukan bentuk macam ikan, vegie sikiiiit aje, TQ!).

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I need to do my hair this weekend. It's getting quite kembangs, i think. O_o'.

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Oh fuck me dead! I have to copy check 3 C.I-s (Corporate Identity) manuals today. My Creative Director was more subtle with just, "Oh SHIT! Oh HOLY SHIT!". *lol*.

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I think i need that pill Calvin was telling me about, the 'Stupid Pill'. It slows down brain activity so one can sleep. Last nite was shit for me. Cudn't fall aslepp till dawn. Just dozed on and off till my alarm went off at 8AM. Pathetic excuse for a sleep. Meh!

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My throat feels like "it's been fucked by sumthing hard and sandpaper-y". ;p Cannot tahan. I'm going to the Doctor's to get me sum industrial strength lozenges!

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It's Mother's Day this weekend. I shall call my sister's up and see what we're doing for my mum this Sunday. :D

Ok that's it. Bye. I need to eat.

You so smug, for what Mother Fuckers?!!

I really gotta get this out of my chest la.

What is up with all these supposed 'happily-takens'? What the fuck do you have to be all smug about huh? I find myself, for the first time in many MANY years truly single and i've just noticed how absurdly smug these MoFos are at their dating status. So, yeah...you have a (let me stress the 'A' part again) boyfriend that comes over on a regular basis but that's no reason to look down on anybody else that's dating around. We're dating around cuz we DON'T wanna settle la bodoh! We know we want (and deserve) better. Sucks to you if you're too damn scared to challenge urself and have low QC. If u think that the tub of lard u so adoringly call 'Sayang' is THE man for you, then by all means...marry the bugger. But then again, does he want to marry YOU? Sebab sampai sekarang pun, haprak takdak! If he wanted to, he wud've...A LOOOOOOONG time ago.

Was i ever this smug when i was engaged? Tak kan? Bluergh.

So, really la. Get off your high horse. There's no reason to be on it in the first place. Smug bitches.

Sekian, Terima Kasih.

It gets easier with time...

NOOOOT!!!

How long has it been? Four months? Coming into the fifth? But i still yearn for you like you're still here. I thought it got better, and for a while it DID! But then, outta the blue...WHAM! You crash into my thoughts. You crashed into it SO hard, that i dream of you. A dream so fucking vivid that i thought it was real. I woke up disappointed that it wasn't.

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You need to come back to Malaysia and fix me!

"It's 30 For A Reason".

I don't think we realize just HOW fragile the human body is...



Simple. Clean. Direct.

I especially love the sound of the bones crackling back into place. O_o!

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P/s:- Going through road safety ads today cause I'm working on some TV Commercial scripts for one of our clients, PLUS Highway. But mine's not gonna be all blood and gore (UNFORTUNATELY. Clients want it wholesome -_-). So, I'm makin' mine insanely funny. Hope they'll buy the idea. ;)

Come August...

Something to look forward to. Because i know...that together with Nine Inch Nails, comes sumthing else i REALLY want to see. ;)

"I'm on my way. I'm on my way. Home sweet home..."

Ahmed and I moved out from Suriamas. He's back home in Jeddah and i moved into Tropics Condo here in Damansara Perdana.

I hate people leaving. It destroys me on the inside. And it just BREAKS me even MORE when it's people I've come to love. As i told his brother when he called that day, "Damn you Hammads! All you boys ever do is make Adry's life miserable. You make me love you guys and then...you fucking leave!". (Apparently, i was half drunk when i said that. ;p).

So, this one's for you kiddo. I'm gonna miss you 'Acchhhmed'.



This is Motley Crue's version. None of that gay Carrie Underwood shiatz that they play at the end of American Idol for me. -_-.

Oh god.

I can't breathe. I'm second guessing my decisions.

I feel like I've made a mistake. A HUGE one.

It's like, I wanna talk to you. But I'm SO fucking angry still.

-_-

Alamaaaak. I hate this.

*Breatheeeee Adry, Breatheeeee*

I'm looking for signs. God if ur listening? Give one to me pls? It'll help a lot. Thanks.

"Hate is a strong word...

...but i really, really, REALLY don't like you".





And since we're on the subject. This one's for you too.





"You're just... a fuck,
I can't explain it 'cause I think you suck.
I'm take-
-in pride
in telling you to fuck off and die.

Goood niiiiiiiiight...."

What I've been up to lately...

Waaaaa. Been about a month since my last post. Anyways. Here's a rundown of what Adry's been up to lately:

Been applying myself at work more. ;D Currently working on an EXCITING pitch for an ice-cream brand. For the first time, i feel like i REALLY wanna win an account.

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Went to Pangkor for some sand, sun and surf action...





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Went to PD with the fam for a bit (cuz my mom sez it's been AGES since she had all her kids at the same place, at the same time). More tan lines!



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Then i decided i'm verging on niggadom cuz of all the beach holidaying. -_-. So i buggered-off to some place colder. ;)



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Went to a couple of parties. I been good this year. I've cut down on the alco intake *muka bangga*.

This was at the Chivas: Live with Chivalry event. Went with Ahmed and his wingman, Jay.



And they had horses! Can i have one for my bday pleeeeease?



Errr...i fed the horse alco. O_o. But apparently it liked it.



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Had a catch-up session with Juju, Farid and Kareem. Dinner and Shisha @ Sahara Tent, then an unscheduled stop for shooter shots/ bar-hopping/ crazy dancing at Changkat Bkt. Bintang.













Damn that was FUN!

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And oh ya. Trying to stop nonsense. What nonsense u ask? The over-the-sea-at-another-country-bullshit-long-distance-crap kinda nonsense. -_-.

Taib. 5ala9! (Translation: Fine. Finish!)

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